Thursday, November 19, 2009

CrossFit


Apparently I’m not the only one who feels “Crossfitters” are over the top. I mean, I do enjoy the vomit-inducing challenge that CrossFit can bring but, man, talk about a group of people who take themselves way too seriously. I know some educated people who understand the merits of Crossfit but most of the dudes you see spewing about it are about as informed as the crazy McCain rally lady.

In my research I’ve run across blog after blog of misguided Crossfit nonsense. The common sentiment seems to be that only they truly understand the meaning of training and human performance, pretty much like the bros in this video. What I always find most entertaining is when they’re using Crossfit to training for a sport but aren’t actually any good in the sport they profess to be training for. Instead of copping to the fact that, say, there might be a more effective way to improve, they chastise those who are bettering them at said event by boasting that they wouldn’t be able to hang down that the Crossfit gym.

My favorite example was a triathlete stating that none of the “wimpy little fuckers” passing him in a race “could dead lift shit”. It’s kind of like a restaurant critic condemning a taqueria for not making sushi.

I’ve been doing my own version of Crossfit lately, which is spending all of my spare time doing construction. The goal before the snows his is to build Romney a carport and turn the garage into a first rate training facility. In order to keep my weight down and balance out my training, I’ve been jack hammering concrete, hanging dry wall, digging foundations, hauling lumber and other great cross training movements until late into each evening. My friend Mike is in charge of the construction. He’s better at all those things than I am. He can also beat me on a bike. But who gives a shit? I’d like to see him do an 8 exercise Tabata and then jump out of a barrel. Now you must excuse me while I take my shirt off and cover my entire hands and forearms with chalk so I can shop for cool new board shorts on the net.

24 comments:

Micah said...

I'm like a fucking navy seal and an olympic gold medalist wrapped in a fucking suit of body armor"

The only thing this clip is missing is a super sized bottle of muscle milk (banana creme of course) in each of their hands.

Alice Lopez said...

Their voices... It's just unsettling.

Alice Lopez said...

Hahahahahaha! But once you get past that, it's hilarious.

Mike Redpath said...

I'd never heard of CrossFit til I read this Gym Jones article in Outside! http://outside.away.com/outside/bodywork/200811/hell-on-earth-fitness-plan-1.html

Brian said...

I have to limit my CrossFit exposure to the internet. It is too wacky going to affiliates in person.

Tyson said...

I don't hate anyone that even attempts to work out but this video was funny.

Steve Edwards said...

I hope this doesn't come across as hatefull. Good lord, just because I make fun of people doesn't mean I hate them. Without rippers the world would be boring. I mean, I make fun of myself pretty much all the time, and I certainly don't hate myself.

Michael Ryan said...

Thank You for this!!! It has been the most ridiculous thing to run into cross fit fanatics who try to convince me that I could be in so much better shape with that than P90X. As if! I'm in killer shape and do more in my life right now than ever before. My kids have learned so much about the health benefits of good food/clean eating, none of which is taught in cross fit. They think that it's for everyone too, even a grandmother. NOT. I ran into a friend who just got cross fit certified; she shared that as long as you stayed for both sessions on this weekend they passed you. That just made it as legit as a "personal trainer" or a getting your real estate license. I happen to have both and will attest that it's a joke and not where the knowledge lies.

You hit it on the head when you talked about the image, the hardcore attitude, the elitist idea that they have the only way. My original cross fit friend has helped maybe 20-30 people with cross fit training. In the same time, i've probably helped 500 people find P90X or Power 90, etc and many of them have finished it and changed their lives. He's also tried to convince me and who ever will listen that his 12 minute work out is harder, going to get you in better shape, etc than any other kind of workout. crazy like drinking the grape koolaid.

voodoo child said...

Steve, this comes at a funny time since I just joined a crossfit gym this week (first one in our area). The cartoon cracked me up and we all know the stereotypes of which you speak but clearly these people exist in all kinds of training. The problem with crossfitters is that they believe everyone should train so that they can both run a 5k in under 20min and deadlift 400lbs... but everyone doesn't want to do that. Some people want to run fast or run long or climb hard and for each of these sports there is an endless # of possibilities to train "better". I enjoy it because it's challenging, taxing, and there's a good sense of community (no matter how crazy). If we can stay away from stereotyping (crossfitters as meatheads as well as those that think crossfit is the "only" way) we'll be a little better off.

leannwoo said...

Oh dear! This Steve is why I love you! Keep up the good work! You have the right attitude towards fitness and life in general!

bob banks said...

Crossfit participants [unfortunately] don't have a monopoly on taking ridiculous photos with their shirts off. The number of P90X "excuse me while I lift up my shirt and show you my sculpted abs" photos is a running joke among some crowds.

Debbie Hamilton Martindale said...

This really made me laugh out loud. Steve Edwards, you're the friggin man. Good luck with your training :)

Steve Edwards said...

Don't worry, Bob, when someone makes a video making fun of P90X I'll post that, too--just as long as it's funny.

screwdestiny said...

Oh man, that was hilarious. Thanks for posting.

Anonymous said...

There is something of the ridiculous that springs from any workout fanaticism. Cyclists, Crossfitters, P90Xers, yoga-ers, barefoot runners, etc. I'm sure it speaks to the boredom and loneliness of our modern life. But hell, people gotta have something to believe in, whether it's god, rock hard abs or the saving grace of a 15lb bike - for the most part, the point of the belief-system is to give one a sense of superiority over others. Me, I believe I'll have a lunchtime run and a cocktail; too bad the rest of you suckers are such teetotalers.

-Josh

Catra Corbett said...

I must admit I'm a crossfitter have been doing crossfit since 06 and yes some of these people are a bit much. Ultrarunning is my sport. Crossfit just helps me to be stronger. I do like my current crossfit gym Unlimited. Other gyms I've been to the people talk way to much shit and getting drunk and doing wods is stupid. There are aways going to be good trainers and bad trainers. I have a level 1 cert. and running and endurance cert.I do believe crossfit has helped my running and made me stronger.I am nothing like those crossfitters you wrote about.

CT Olson said...

There's certainly an edge (or inflated ego) there to crossfit. I always come back to the injury thing why I don't like Olympic lifts. And I've done some of that in the past. But I end up hurting myself and getting sidelined and out of shape for periods of time. And it's effort for me to get to a gym all the time, what with a family etc it's just enough to mess things up.

But as someone mentioned - some great things and overlap with P90x "muscle confusion" techniques also. And I don't blame anyone for exercise in this day of rampant obesity and sedentary lifestyle for sure!

Joey said...

I kid you not, I was at my 10 year high school reunion tonight and this girl I know who I actually am her coach for P90X came up to me and the first thing out of her mouth was "I love Crossfit. P90X is good but I'm just all about crossfit. P90X has some Crossfit moves in there but Crossfit is way better." I said, "That's awesome. I'm so glad you found what works for you." And that was it but I couldn't help but laugh. Thanks again for posting this Steve.

Joey

Steve Edwards said...

I have no problem with Crossfit. It's fun and good exercise. My only issue is with those who spew about elitism and how it's the only way to train, which is just plain ridiculous. At least she didn't pontificate about how she is now clearly superior to you and that, if you had any sense, you'd allow her to become your coach.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps you could give us a side by side comparison of the fitness elements within P90X and Crossfit. Pros and cons.
My theory is to learn both and then do what I want based on personal goals and needs.

~Wayne

Steve Edwards said...

It's not fair to Crossfit to do this because one is a training system and the other is a style of training. There are good Crossfit gyms and trainers and bad ones, just like in any style of training. But I think there is enough confusion on the subject to discuss it in further depth, so I'll post on this when I get some time.

Hassan90X said...

LOL the video is hilarious. I was on the crossfit boards and was searching up "puking after workout" the first time I tryed insanity I did puke. The people on the boards were like "oh I puke after every leg workout or extreme cardio" I was shocked. haha there is a point of pushing but once you cross that point it can be lethal. Still I respect people who do crazy crossfit workouts.

Anonymous said...

the only thing the video was missing was some insane libertarian Michael Savage- or Glenn Beck-inspired nonsense. The Crossfit WOD boards are rife with it... especially the rest days, where the Obama-is-a-socialist/fascist/secret Muslim caterwaul about their latest predictions of the doom of America and the rise of the hordes of the great unwashed. Good times. I'll take my workout without a side-dish of batsh*t crazy, thanks.

Anonymous said...

Wow, how do you go from crossfit to baggin on Glenn Beck? I think that you may have problems making connections. Keep YOUR insanity to yourself. I was waiting to hear these guys talk about their awesome 5-toe shoes and tons of body ink. "Elite" crossfitters are a joke. This video is hilarious and describes the guys at my university gym to a T.